I'm fat, I know. But I don't need you to tell me so.

It's a fact girls and boys. Yes, I never try to hide from the fact that I am fat. In medical term, obese. Oh yes, obese because my BMI is way over where it is supposed to be. I know my facts..I learned about healthy eating, healthy lifestyle, nutrition and what have you in dental school, and from professor Google.... but still.. I am what I am.

 

Living in Japan is tough for woman. Especially woman with weight problems.  Everyone here is soooo skinny. Except for their national warriors, the sumo wrestlers of course.. but other than that.. fuh... Even my daughter who is just in 2nd grade always talk about how she has to control her diet because her friend told her that her legs and arms are rather thick. She is not what I would say a fat child. She is 135 cm, and weighs 31 kg. Perfectly normal for a kid her age. But no... people have to say what they wanted to say.. *sigh*.

 

So full these people are with their weight issues (even though in my humble opinion, it is not an issue at all), you can see the booming of these slimming centres and weight loss supplements. This did not only affect the girls but guys as well..

 

By the way, there are two people in my lab who always talk about other people's weight. These two are very very very skinny. But they kept on saying, especially the female that they need to watch what they eat or they will end up being fat like our professor. And they will laugh at how the professor is fat, has short legs and so on. Is the professor fat and has short legs? Well, she is not skinny. But she definitely is not fat. As for having short legs. I think half of the Japanese population has kind of proportionally shorter legs. Its's genetic perhaps..but it's not something that you should laugh about.

 

Sometimes these two would joke about how the professor is wealthy, and being fat is a sign of wealth. And then they would look at me and snigger.. And the female would say, ah..Naa, you must be very rich then...Well... Not Funny. I just laughed along though. I assume that these two are just so stressed out working under the professor that they found this joking about her could actually lighten their burden. Ah well.. Certainly not something someone around 50 years old would do.. right? Now I have to cross my fingers that they don't read this blog. Hahaha...

 

And I know it already! It's obvious. I have a mirror.. a full lenght mirror at home so I can see how fat I am now. You telling me that I am fat is not going to help me or do me any good other than hurt my already sensitive soul. Ouch.

 

Well, did I tell you, a few years back I lost almost 30 kilos.. yes.. 30 kilos (Americans, you do the conversion to pounds yourself) because I was so bored and had nothing much to aim for in life. So I made it a point to go on a diet. Oh boy.. I only ate very little, sometimes no rice at all a day. I took lots of salad and lean meat like turkey breasts, and white meat instead of red meat. I stopped all kind of sugary drinks. I only had ice cream once a month maybe..I also sweat a lot during sauna sessions..... It was crazy tough.. I didn't like the process a bit.. But..

 

After a year and 30 kilos lighter, I really felt and looked good. I was still in the overweight zone, but it was such a major change, every one who saw me were so surprised and did not even realize that I still had a few more kilos to shed. But... but... the sad thing was..the glory of looking and feeling great was not meant to last. I got pregnant with my second child and I just lost to temptations. And now I am back to square one.  Only God knows how frustrating it is..I still dream of losing weight .. but all my efforts to go on diet only lasted around 3 to 4 weeks... What can I say, I just love food!  :)

 

Anyway, I think I would love to start a weight loss progamme again before I graduate in 2015. Hopefully within the next one year, I can lose a few kilos to look good in graduation pics. Pray for me. Send heartwarming thoughts and comments!

 

 

 

"Your English is difficult to understand. Maybe because you are Malaysian"

Yes. I got that A LOT. But surprisingly all those comments were from non native English speakers or those who do not speak English that well. Nevertheless, they really damaged my self-confidence.

Am I that bad? Gee, I don't know. I wish I can tell whether I am good or not. I have never set foot in a country where the national language is English. And the native speakers that I know, I can only count them with my right hand. 

There was the late Kevin Cleary, American professor, who taught English in my university.

Mr McKenzie, another American who taught us English when I was in first and second year in Dental school.

Mr Nuttall, another English teacher from my University year. He's British though.

And of course, Bobby Thompson, who came to Japan to do his internship at Yoshida company. He was supposed to check English translations done by Yoshida staff but went back with a larger tummy courtesy of Japanese hospitality.

Mr McKenzie kept on praising my English every time he saw me. In one of his homework, he asked us to record ourselves reading poems. So mesmerized he was by my recitation, heh, he asked my permission to send the recording to the author (which was his mom actually). Apparently, I was the first Malaysian he knew and he was so amazed to know that Malaysian spoke English so well.

After half a year, Mr Nuttall and Mr McKenzie excused me from their classes because they said that my level was too high for the classes they were teaching. Mind you, I was not that great, but in Japan, they started learning English when they were in junior high. So what they learned in the first year of college was equivalent to what I learned in secondary school in Malaysia.

Kevin (as everyone here affectionately called him) used to tell me several times that he did not feel like speaking to a non-native when he was talking to me. He also told me that my pronunciation was good. May his soul rest in peace. He passed away recently due to heart problem.

As for Bobby, I still remember when I first spoke to him. Well, we were at a party.. sort of... It was rather silly because we were supposed to watch the famous Tsumida gawa fireworks display in summer 2012 but the old guy who was supposed to book a good spot (read: a spot with good view of the firework) somehow managed to book a spot with zero view. Yes, zero view of the fireworks. We could only hear the crackling sounds. But there was absolutely nothing to see from our spot. Nothing, So we ended up eating and drinking while entertaining ourselves to the sound of the most well known fireworks display in Tokyo. And Bobby being the blonde guy from America who spoke almost zero Japanese caught the attention of every one in our group. They were all like waiting in line to speak to him. He was definitely treated like a celebrity that night. Little did I know that he actually did not understand more than half of the conversation that night. He later told me that he just smiled and replied 'Yeah...' here and there..to everything said to him. Ah, so young and so polite... You've got to love that boy.

I was 'enjoying' the sound of the fireworks when I saw he was having difficulties trying to get the direction to the nearest public toilet from one of our friends. So I went up to him and offered my help. His first reaction was, " You speak English!" Well, I told him, the guy who was trying to explain where the toilet was to him also spoke English. To which he laughed and added "But you speak English like you have been speaking English for the rest of your life". Coming from a native, I took that as a compliment. And that really made me happy. So happy that I still remember it in detail. I doubt Bobby remembers what he said though. Anyway, just a trivia on Bobby, his sister used to represent the states for fencing. Cool, huh?

I am not writing this to brag about how all the native English speakers I knew praised my English ability. But I am here to highlight how most of the time people judge your language ability from your appearance. Especially people who know very little about the language. That is why I can never win a job offer for teaching English in Japan if my competitors are blonde and blue eyed. Even if they sound like Hitler when they speak English. 

Ah well, it's annoying but, I don't really care.. I don't teach English for a living anyway.

Major distraction

So, almost one year back I declared that I will write more. I wanted to write more. That definitely was and still is  the truth. But I have to say, I blame all sort of distractions that have been doing their best distracting me from writing masterpieces *feel free to puke* here on this blog. I don't want to call my family a distraction but time spent with them, as precious as it may have been, definitely limited my time to write. And as for my current goal is to get a Ph.D before October 2015, working towards it also contributed to the absence of quality time to just sit down and pen (keyboard? ) my thoughts. Ok, guys, I can hear you.. yes, I should know my priorities. Just in case you did not get it.. I do know my priorities. hence the lack of posts in all my blogs combined. 

Just so that you know, they (the lady who holds the power and her two side kicks, well mainly it was the lady's decision) finally allowed me to submit one paper after one whole bloody year of rewriting. Bear in mind girls and boys before you start hitting the keyboard to congratulate me..It was just submitted. Not even accepted yet. My time is running short. But.. lets just have faith shall we. 

Actually, I am supposed to continue with my second paper but at times like this, why must my freaky brain reverts to its old self and start dreaming of silly, yes seriously silly things! Did I tell you I used to dream, weird dreams. Of people I never really cared about while I was wide awake. When I was young, I remember dreaming of pillion riding a bike with Luke Perry. Luke who? Well, he was much adored by my friends when we were teenagers. I didn't really fancy him but since everyone around me were talking about him, how they wish he was their boyfriend and what not.. ah.. you know, when a group of teenage girls in an all girls boarding school whose only source of male entertainment were either the very few male teachers and staff we had in school .. Lack of testosterone in our life made us rather pathetic in other teenagers eyes maybe. I remember a friend even had a crush on the gardener! He was not that good looking to begin with. Yes. sad... but true..that was life, growing up in an all girls environment... haha. 

Back to my freaky brain, dreaming of silly dreams. Well, two nights back, I woke up with a start. Nah.. not really.. I just wanted to use that phrase. I first learned the phrase reading my classmate's Juya's English homework when we were in secondary school. And it sounded rather cool to me.. Woke up with a start. heh. There, another distraction. I am digressing again... Focus! 

Well, this time, the guy who appeared in my dream was a member of Japanese boy band.. well. I wouldn't really describe them as boy band  because number one, they are not boys. The youngest is 30 years old!  As for band, well, they don't really play instruments, they dance, and sing.. but basically they are more well known as dancers or performers as per description of themselves on wikipedia. 

I didn't even know his name before this stupid dream but there he was, all smiles, looking so sweet with nice teeth and dimple on his right cheek. And I didn't even remember what he was doing in my dream. I only remember I had this tingling feeling of when someone you really adore, noticed you for the first time, when I woke up in the morning. And for the past two days, I have spent my precious time googling his information, beginning with his name, both in Japanese and English. I only roughly remembered he was with the popular dance group. That's all I had for a start..Well, the more I learned about him, the more I think I am infatuated. Not only he's talented as a performer, he has the sweet look with that sweet, sweet dimple, rather tall for a Japanese at 180 cm, he has the kind of voice I like, and boy, he's such an artist. It's not the artist that just sing and dance type of artist but the artist who can draw and do amazing piece with their hands. He's apparently very good in Japanese calligraphy. The only drawback is perhaps he's 7 years younger than me.. Ok. Now you can laugh your heads off..What am I thinking? It should never matter because

1. The probability of him coming across this post is like one in a gazillion..

2. Even if he read this, the probability of him wanting to see who the silly author is, is another one in a gazillion.

3. Even if by miracle he stumbled upon and by another divine intervention, he wished to see me in person.. what's the point? I am but a married auntie.. hahaha

4. It was just a stupid dream man.

Well, as G William Domhoff suggest, dreams most likely serve no real purposes. He distracted me from my job. He took my time and made me google himself after the dream. But, he gave me a warm fuzzy and happy feeling that morning. So for that, I thank you, Takahiro :)

If you want to know more about Takahiro and Exile, google :)

iPhone blogging

Yeay! I can now blog while on the move! Lovely... Though it took me days to figure out how to get my post published via this app.. It still is lovelier than not having the chance to write things down when I wanted to.. Wait for more to come! Hopefully .. :)

Sayonara 28

First of all, I must tell the world (though it is highly unlikely the world is reading my blog), that I am highly impressed with the lovely oral surgeon who did a minor surgery to remove my upper left wisdom tooth just now! Blessed with teeth with long sturdy roots, extraction is not something that I look forward to.  

The oral surgeon who also happened to be my friend from dental school did the surgery alone, from incision to removal to  suturing. Without fussing over how the assistant not shining the light properly or scolding them for poorly retracting patient's cheek or putting the blame on the assistant's bad performance when the surgery didn't go as planned. Nope. She was cool all the way, without any assistant to help her! 

By the way, I felt obliged to share the story not because of her but to urge everyone with partially impacted wisdom teeth that you can't really see, let alone brush properly.. Go and get them out asap. I knew mine had coronal caries only after she removed it and showed it to me. Just imagine how much of a hassle it's going to be to remove this half embedded tooth if I ignore it until the caries eats up the whole crown! Scary..

Anyway,

Thanks Dr M. I owe you one :)

Autobiography

Ok.. I know, I am not a public figure. But who cares, I still want to write my life story because only I know what happened to me during my lifetime, minus those years when I was still in my diapers. And no one is going to write one for me anyway, so why not I do it then? I just want to write things so that I won't forget them and I want to share my life story with my children and their children. Who knows, 100 years later it might become a hit? Well, you know they say people like you better once you are dead ? Well, I am penning mine and it's going to be on a secret blog. which I will write the password  on the will to be read out to my children when I am no longer around. How's that?

So, you want to be a dentist?- Part 2

Yoohoo! How are you people? I have an update for my entry So, You Want To Be A Dentist . 

Good news y'all, the government has reduced the compulsory service from 3 years to 2 years so you who can't wait to jump into the money churning business of being a private dentist attending to high end clients, you are one year shorter to your dream!! But rumour has it that if you know the minister, you can actually try your luck and ask his permission for your compulsory service to be even shorter! Remember, it's the rumours.. not me ok! So stop going to the authorities and suggest them to take disciplinary action against me. Get a life you! you know who you are!!